I'm not totally sure where this blog post is going to go, but in the past two weeks and in the weeks to come, I have faced and will face hard, hard decisions. But the Lord is sovereign and He is gracious to teach me and grow me and make me more like Him through it all.
And maybe that's the point of this. To work through the truths that He is teaching me so that I can look back on this in x amount of time and clearly see His goodness. To share truth with you, dear reader, so that whether you face hardship now or in the future, you can rest in these same truths, you can rest in the One Who is good and Who is faithful always.
It is so natural and easy for me to take every burden that I possibly can and carry it on my shoulders. My burden, my neighbors burden, a burden that I may possibly have in the future, etc. It's my nature to step up and take responsibility for it. To figure out what is right and take action. To make a decision.
The Lord is slowly showing me to consult Him in these times and to seek out His will for the situation.
So I'm doing that. But now my problem is that I want answers.
I'm a product of a "microwave" generation. Of a generation who wants answers and gets them in milliseconds with the click of a button or two.
But trusting in the Lord is so much more than trusting in His answers, in His decisions when He gives them. It's about trusting His timing. It's about remembering that He sees the whole picture and that I am so nearsighted that I can only see the next step or two, and even that with blurred vision.
Ok, so I trust. I relax. I "let go and let God." He has shown me that He is worthy of trust over and over again, so no problem.
But in the midst of this, I'm seeing that there is more to this than seeking the Lord for a specific answer to a specific problem
There is a heart problem that runs much deeper.
We are constantly faced with problems and trials on the Earth, and we run around fretting and worrying over them in a way that makes us think we're going about it righteously. We ask questions along the lines of, "Will I make the right decision, the one that honors God and brings Him the most glory? How will I know if what I decide is God's will?"
I'm not saying this is a bad outlook. It's actually a great mindset, one that says, "Lord, I trust you. Show me your will and I'll obey."
The problem is that the Lord has told us His will:
It is God's will that you should be sanctified -1 Thessalonians 4:3
Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. -1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
We get so caught up in working and searching and figuring out God's will for us that we miss it. It's already been so clearly stated.
Now, I know: Ok, so I'm supposed to be sanctified, be joyful, pray, and be thankful. But how in the world am I supposed to make this huge decision? How am I supposed to proceed in this given situation? Praise God that He answers those questions too:
Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--His good, pleasing and perfect will. -Romans 12:2
Continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to His good purpose. -Philippians 2:12-13
My fear has been that I won't make the right decisions because I know that I am wretched and sinful. But the answer to my problems isn't to seek out the right answer but to first and foremost seek out the LORD. The more time I spend with Him, the more He will match my desires up with His. It is then that He will help me to make the decision that is good and right and brings Him glory. It is then that He will enable me to act according to His good purpose.
He isn't a God who sits in heaven and plays guessing games with us. He isn't having fun trying to see if we make the right decision. He is just a God who wants us to love Him. Who wants us to seek Him with all of our hearts and give Him our lives. His desire is for us to live righteously, so of course He is going to help us make the right decision!
We just have to seek Him like we never have before, by His grace.
And the umbrella over all of these thoughts is that this life is about God. It isn't about exams or majors or leases or dating. These are things we face, sure. But my identity isn't found in these things, for it is found in the truth that Christ came to this earth and died for my sin so that one day I can spend eternity in His presence, worshipping Him.
These slight and momentary problems that we face pale in the truth that "God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God." (1 Corinthians 5:21).
So, I am to rejoice in the grace and truth of the gospel.
I am to seek the Lord.
I am to "make every effort to add to my faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if I possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep me from being ineffective and unproductive in my knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But if anyone does not have them, he is nearsighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins." (2 Peter 1:5-9)
Praise God for His Son. Praise God that by His grace He has cleansed me from my sins. Praise God that He is at work in me, sanctifying me. Praise God that He has a good and perfect plan.
Praise God.
